- You’re about 70% confident in your performance, and 30% absolutely, completely, never-endingly, totally FREAKED about your performance.
- Your best performances are when you stop thinking and just SING.
- There is always some kind of divide between you and instrumentalists – it genuinely feels like you speak different languages.
- You know all the words to the following songs: “Horses” (Australian-specific), “Walking On Sunshine”, “Brown Eyed Girl”, “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” and “Billie Jean”.
- FEMALE SINGERS: A microphone may be your only piece of gear but my word, you will bling that baby in colour/diamantes/gold. Yeah gurl.
- You are always asked to sing at family gatherings, especially Christmas.
- You have absolutely HONED your crowd banter chit chat skills – some key phrases include:
– “I wanna see ya’ll get dowwwwn!”
– “We have a very special guest performer about to join us – Barry! The bride’s uncle!”
– “Hey guys remember to be safe! Standing on tables can be a little risky…” [security moves through the crowd]
- You do not know how to roll leads.
- You know you shouldn’t, but you could avoid setup time, you know, if you wanted to. NB: this may contribute to the issue outlined in #3.
- You know the minimum amount of dressing up/make up you need to do in order to be passable as a lead singer of a band, without tooooo much effort involved.
- Getting sick is truthfully the WORST thing that could happen – a genuine nightmare. If someone you know is sick you will avoid them at all costs, and if they come near you, you will spray them with antibacterial spray.
- When asked to sing that song just a semitone higher, your first response is: “Um, EXCUSE ME?”
- Listening to a recording of yourself leads to real and actual life meltdowns.
- There’s a part of you that cares what people think of your voice, then there’s an even louder and more stubborn part of you that couldn’t care less. Get stuffed critics.
- You break into harmonies when you hear a song you love. This commonly turns into multiple harmonies when surrounded by other singers.
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